-One More Time-
as i cant fell aslp now...
i shall blog what had strike me during service today...
pastor chui chui was sharing...
then something hit me...
i went into deep thoughts...
deep thinking of past current and future...
remembering how i was hurted so much by the ppl i care for...
how i was deliver from pain and suffering...
how much joy i had...
how much things i still looking forward to...
how much i can do, could have done, will do...
alot of thinking...
how i come to church...
stayed with church...
flow with church...
how i almost fall from church...
how i almost left...
how i recome back...
how many stupid things i done...
how many errors...
chances...
things happening since 16 to now 23...
ppl i see come and go...
go and come...
leave back leave back leave...
how ppl got attached, break, attached, break, attached...
how ppl attached, married, die...
during these few years spell...
so many things happen...
how i was treated...
how i treated ppl...
how ppl misuse me...
how i misuse ppl...
how i felt like punching many ppl...
how i make ppl feel like punching me...
how i hav to endure so much pain...
juz to maintain a gd testimony...
how i hav to walk away from being exploded...
how ppl try to stop me from exploding...
how ppl explode at me...
how i defend myself...
how i manage to flee from temptation...
how temptation trys to hit me...
how and why i dare to make such statement...
why my stand and principle so weird...
why i m so jerk...
why i treat diff ppl differently...
why i can like 1 yet hate another...
why?
why?
why?
i dunno...
so many question...
so many answers...
so many ...
prayers...
God want me to pray...
GOD!
guide me...
lead me...
thru every decision i hav to chose...
like...
to Study? or to Work?
Be good, or be Bad Boy...
Isnt She? her? Her? She?
so many questions...
ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
all these thinking...
all these thoughts...
how was i left behind...
it juz makes no sense blogging now...
time to slp...
-byebye-
Nelvin Blogged @ 12:50 AM
